I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
