doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize