just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
