I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I can text with my tongue
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
