So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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