i was born a porn star she said
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
