So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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