Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Alive.
So much puke
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Holy sore nipples Batman
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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