Whod you bang
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
