I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
