Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
