There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Boobs are out for the taking
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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