these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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