is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
