You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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