I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
We need to rekindle our bromance
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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