Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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