Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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