I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
