My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
