i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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