i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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