The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
