And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
