like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
