I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize