well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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