tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Randomize
