Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
