i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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