You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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