At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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