it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
