yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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