like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
