I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Randomize
