I seem to have left my pride at pride
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
