shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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