Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
