But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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