i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
everyone is single if you try hard enough
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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