ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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