dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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