she was so not down for the gang bang
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
