i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
