Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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