Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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