dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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