Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
