I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
